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Finding Self in Internal Family Systems (IFS)

What is Self?

Self is the calm, curious core of you that can connect with and care for all your parts.


When in Self

When you’re in Self, you feel spacious, open, and able to witness your inner experience without being overwhelmed by it.

Example: Anxiety

Instead of being the anxiety, you might say:

“I notice a part of me feels anxious right now, and I’m curious about what it needs.”

That curious part of you is Self.


The 8 C’s of Self

Qualities of Self include:

  • Compassion
  • Curiosity
  • Clarity
  • Calm
  • Confidence
  • Courage
  • Creativity
  • Connectedness

Self Quiz

You may be in Self if you can say:

  • I feel clear about what’s going on inside me
  • I’m curious about my thoughts or feelings
  • I feel compassion toward myself
  • I trust I can handle what I feel
  • I feel calm in my body

Final Note

In IFS, all parts are welcome. Connecting with Self helps you bring healing and balance to every part of who you are.


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