Burdens in Internal Family Systems (IFS)
What Are Burdens?
A burden is a painful belief or emotion that a part carries from the past.
Burdens often come from experiences that were too big, too scary, or too lonely to face when they first happened.
When a Part Carries a Burden
It’s not just doing a job — it’s carrying pain.
Often, it’s trying to protect you by:
- Working too hard
- Avoiding things
- Lashing out
- Shutting down
- Overthinking everything
- Going quiet
How Burdens Form
Here’s how an experience can create a burden and shape a protector:
Experience | Exile | Burden | Protector |
---|---|---|---|
Being scolded for small mistakes | Feeling not good enough | If I’m not perfect, I’ll be rejected | Inner Critic |
Facing big emotions with no support | Overwhelm | If I try, I’ll fall apart | Avoider |
Only valued when being helpful | Fear of disconnection | If I say no, I won’t be accepted | People Pleaser |
Unburdening
When parts feel seen, heard, and known, they can begin to heal.
Questions for reflection:
- What feels heavy or stuck in me today?
- Is a part of me carrying this?
- What is it afraid of or protecting me from?
- What might it feel without this weight?
Final Note
In IFS, all parts are welcome — even those carrying burdens.
With compassion, burdens can be released, making space for healing and freedom.