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Burdens in Internal Family Systems (IFS)

What Are Burdens?

A burden is a painful belief or emotion that a part carries from the past.
Burdens often come from experiences that were too big, too scary, or too lonely to face when they first happened.


When a Part Carries a Burden

It’s not just doing a job — it’s carrying pain.
Often, it’s trying to protect you by:

  • Working too hard
  • Avoiding things
  • Lashing out
  • Shutting down
  • Overthinking everything
  • Going quiet

How Burdens Form

Here’s how an experience can create a burden and shape a protector:

Experience Exile Burden Protector
Being scolded for small mistakes Feeling not good enough If I’m not perfect, I’ll be rejected Inner Critic
Facing big emotions with no support Overwhelm If I try, I’ll fall apart Avoider
Only valued when being helpful Fear of disconnection If I say no, I won’t be accepted People Pleaser

Unburdening

When parts feel seen, heard, and known, they can begin to heal.

Questions for reflection:

  • What feels heavy or stuck in me today?
  • Is a part of me carrying this?
  • What is it afraid of or protecting me from?
  • What might it feel without this weight?

Final Note

In IFS, all parts are welcome — even those carrying burdens.
With compassion, burdens can be released, making space for healing and freedom.


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